So, usually when I update my blog I put a link on Facebook, but today's post is little too private for that, and yet, I feel the need to just talk to somebody and my computer screen is the best option I have right now.
So first, I've been under a lot of stress lately. I've had issues with money, school, work, and my relationships. So let's go through each one and just vent about why I'm frustrated right now.
First, Money. Recently I bought a house and I was doing well on making the payments, last month, however, November, I had an issue and was unable to get the money put together. December isn't looking to good either right now. In the past I've asked my mom for help but she's seemed under stress because of their own financial situation and I felt bad asking her for money. It's my own fault. But now I've got back utility bills, a month late mortgage payment and no idea how I'm going to pay it.
Second, school. This is somewhat related to money but in the past I haven't done super awesome in school. I'm two-thirds of the way to my degree and this semester I was unable to get financial aid. I now have to pay for this semester by myself and I have to pay for it before I can go back to school. As I mentioned above, I don't have enough money to pay for the things I need right now. I can't afford to pay for a semester of school.
Third, work. Work overall is okay except for a small incident that happened back in August and in which I did everything I should have done and everything I was told to do and yet I'm just now having to deal with the lies other people told and the choices that were made for me. I won't go into detail but I'm sick of being told what to say and do.
Finally, and this is the big one relationships. As I'm sure you know, I am married, however what most of you don't know is that my wife has been talking seriously about getting a divorce for the past three months. She's stopped sleeping in the same bed as me, she's pulling away and I don't know what to do. I'm trying to be respectful of what she wants but it hurts and I don't want it. I don't know what to do right now. She's always been my best friend and now she's trying to break that. We get in fights because I don't want to let go and she says that I need to. I just don't know what to do in this situation.
I have friends but I hate to tell them about these kinds of things, so I put it out to the internet, I have two followers here and I'm pretty sure my mom is one of them, so maybe they'll see this. Anyway it just feels a little cathartic to get it out and put it out there. Maybe someone can give me some advice, because, as I've said multiple times. . . I don't know what to do. . .
